Tales of Home [7]

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by David H on Sun Jul 16, 2017 3:08 pm

Pettytyrant101 wrote:{{Also - 'more than a third of those accused of homicide were under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs at the time.'}}}

Wait, that means almost 2/3's were SOBER??!!!! Shocked Shocked Shocked

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by azriel on Sun Jul 16, 2017 3:36 pm

That's a sobering thought pale

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Pettytyrant101 on Tue Jul 18, 2017 6:17 am


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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by azriel on Tue Jul 18, 2017 9:28 pm

So weird Laughing That got me thinking......Here's what I found ...

1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament (27%)
2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside-down (7%)
3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store (6%)
Related Articles
Don't die in parliament, says stupidest law 12 Apr 2008
4. Mince pies cannot be eaten on Christmas Day (5%)
5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter (4%)
6. In the UK a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet (4%)
7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the King, and the tail of the Queen (3.5%)
8. It is illegal not to tell the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing (3%)
9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour
10. In the city of York it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow (2%)
And some more................

The top ten weirdest laws in Britain today
1.    All beached whales and sturgeons must be offered to the Reigning Monarch
2.    No person shall, in the course of a business, import into England, potatoes which he knows, or has reasonable cause to suspect, are from Poland
3.    It is Illegal to be drunk in the pub
4.    It is illegal to carry a plank along a pavement (as well as any ladder, wheel, pole, cask, placard, showboard, or hoop) in the Metropolitan Police District
5.    MPs are not allowed to wear armour in Parliament
6.    It is an offence to be drunk and in charge of cattle in England and Wales
7.    It is illegal to handle a salmon in suspicious circumstances
8.    It is an offence to beat or shake any carpet, rug, or mat (except door mats before 8am) in a thoroughfare in the Metropolitan Police District
9.    It is illegal to jump the queue in the Tube ticket hall
10.    It is illegal to activate your burglar alarm without first nominating a ‘Key-Holder’ who can switch it off in your absence.





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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Eldorion on Tue Jul 18, 2017 9:53 pm

azriel wrote:9.    It is illegal to jump the queue in the Tube ticket hall

Throw 'em in the Tower of London.
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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by azriel on Tue Jul 18, 2017 11:25 pm

I bet there's half a dozen illegal things connected with that as well Laughing

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by David H on Wed Jul 19, 2017 2:04 am

azriel wrote:
5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter

That's just common sense. Otherwise they'll just shit in your field. Mad Mad Mad

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Eldorion on Wed Jul 19, 2017 4:47 am

Laughing
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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Pettytyrant101 on Wed Jul 19, 2017 6:23 am

{{{ Well if you'd built your farm the other way round with the main building at the lane end and the fields where the buildings are- I could shit in your barn instead on my way home from the Duck 'n' Muck Twisted Evil And I could usethe straw for bog roll. Got to be better than cranberry leaves they are so fiddly, and already wet. No }}

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by David H on Wed Jul 19, 2017 7:17 am

Pettytyrant101 wrote:{{{ I could shit in your barn instead on my way home from the Duck 'n' Muck  }}

You're welcome to try, but my bull might have something to say about it... Twisted Evil

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Pettytyrant101 on Wed Jul 19, 2017 9:39 am

{{{{ Now you see thats exactly the sort of irresponsible behaviour that gives farmers such a bad name with poor innocent drunkards who are just innocently and quietly passing through and helping to increase the yield with extra, all natural, free manure. Honestly you try to help out and what thanks do you get?- a ruddy bulls horns rammed up your arse that's what! Mad }}}

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by azriel on Sun Jul 23, 2017 5:00 pm

Ive been busy brewing up & bottling Elderflower Cordial and, Rose hip syrup Smile Ive got all the bottles lurking in the dark space beside my washing machine in the kitchen. You can be forgotten about for years in there Very Happy Ive also been picking blackberries & very nice they are too Smile




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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by halfwise on Sun Jul 23, 2017 5:14 pm

Road trip to Az's place!!

(How do you use rose-hip syrup? I only know of rose hips being used in tea.)

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Pettytyrant101 on Sun Jul 23, 2017 5:42 pm

{{Where do I place my order Azriel? And do you stock by the barrel? drunken
ps do you home deliver by broomstick, or flying monkeys or something? }}

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by David H on Sun Jul 23, 2017 6:43 pm

Sounds heavenly! sunny

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Amarië on Sun Jul 23, 2017 8:00 pm

I want shiremoot at Azzie's place. I love you

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by azriel on Mon Jul 24, 2017 11:10 am

Laughing  You lot are funny ! I love you all I love you

Just drink Rosehip neat Halfy, its so good for you Smile Or make desserts ? cakeys, biscuits ?
I just enjoy foraging & rummaging for free food Smile

Restringing the broom for Autumn Petty so, I have in fact found a very good delivery service....



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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Pettytyrant101 on Tue Jul 25, 2017 7:32 am

{{Makes you proud to be Scottish- you hunt oot those buckie dregs lass- oan yersel!! Laughing }}}

https://www.facebook.com/scotlandscotland/videos/1353868711349159/

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by azriel on Tue Jul 25, 2017 12:14 pm

Ive seen some 'odd sods' doing daft stuff like that down here also. To be honest I think if there's a price on something people will go for it. If you knew you could get say....£1000 per ton on scrap metal, youde do it. The Government will make paupers of us all.

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by azriel on Wed Jul 26, 2017 12:34 pm


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If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got



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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Mrs Figg on Wed Jul 26, 2017 8:04 pm

Hey Petty can we meet in York?

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Pettytyrant101 on Wed Jul 26, 2017 8:33 pm

{{ We can try!! When you there? }}

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by halfwise on Wed Jul 26, 2017 10:26 pm

Shocked This forumshire meet better damn well be documented for posterity! Twisted Evil

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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Eldorion on Wed Jul 26, 2017 10:45 pm

Who will be there to referee?
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Re: Tales of Home [7]

Post by Pettytyrant101 on Thu Jul 27, 2017 12:52 am

{{{ Well if Figg brings Mr Figg and I bring my better half then can referee- or at least gesticulate wildly at us a lot Smile }}}

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