Rename the LOTR Movies

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Post by bungobaggins on Thu Apr 24, 2014 6:01 pm

In light of today's news, I thought it would be a fun exercise to rename the LOTR movies from the viewpoint of a cynical marketing executive at New Line/WB.

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Post by bungobaggins on Thu Apr 24, 2014 6:09 pm

The Lord of the Rings: Nine Men and a Ring (Seriously, it's not a porno.)

The Lord of the Rings: The Bad Guys Form an Alliance

The Lord of the Rings: The One Where There's Two Big Battles in the Same Movie

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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 6:30 pm

Lord of The rings............Failure does exist

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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 6:32 pm

Lord of The Rings...... a Tale of daring do.........only peter Jackson didnt

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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 6:32 pm

Look, I know its meant to be pro-active & positive but, I jooooost canna do it ! All I can think of are mickey takes !

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"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

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Rename the LOTR Movies 15403410
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Post by Mrs Figg on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:03 pm

FOTR...Good Fellows Kick Ass
TT...Towering Inferno Renaissance Stylee
ROTK..Revenge of the Sauronator

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Post by Forest Shepherd on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:34 pm

Announcing: The Lord of the Rings MEGA-SEXTILOGY! (it's not porn, we promise!)

11 December, 2001: Agent Smith is Grumpy
An Expected Fellowship...Also Figwit

12 December, 2002: Agent Smith is Telepathic
Flaming Eyeballs Make Good Allies... Also Gimli is Fat, ha ha

13 December, 2003: Agent Smith Saves the Day
The Steward Sucks!...Also Aragorn is an Awkward Singer

14 December, 2012: Ew Hermoine, Troll Bogeys!
An Expected Paycheck... and Figwit 2.0!

13 December, 2013: Bombur is Fat, ha ha
Deviation from Story...Wait Golden Wasn't a Metaphor?

17 December, 2014: Flaming Eyeball! +10 to Orc Stamina!
The Battle for the Golden Snitch...OK it's made of Diamond's, whatever...

18 December, 2015: ???


Last edited by Forest Shepherd on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:42 pm; edited 2 times in total

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"'But whereas we have drunk with thee, who seemest to be a man of lineage, and thou hast been blithe with us, we will tell thee that we have seen one riding south along the Greenway, clad in a coat as green as the way, with the leafless tree done on his breast. So nigh to him we were that we heard his cry as he sped along, as ye may hear the lapwing whining, for he said: "POINT AND EDGE, POINT AND EDGE! THE RED WATER AMIDST OF THE HILLS!" In my lifetime such a man hath, to my knowledge, been seen thrice before; and after each sight of him followed evil days and the death of men.'"

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Post by Eldorion on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:37 pm

Serious answer:

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the Shadow
The Lord of the Rings: The Treason of Isengard
The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Ring

Spoiler:
These are actually the titles of the LOTR-related volumes of The History of Middle-earth and come from Tolkien's own brainstorming sessions.  They seem to fit the theme, though. Razz
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Post by Mrs Figg on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:38 pm

hey! Viggo is a lovely singer!  Mad 

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Post by Forest Shepherd on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:39 pm

Laughing 
I knew you'd say something about that.  Razz 

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"'But whereas we have drunk with thee, who seemest to be a man of lineage, and thou hast been blithe with us, we will tell thee that we have seen one riding south along the Greenway, clad in a coat as green as the way, with the leafless tree done on his breast. So nigh to him we were that we heard his cry as he sped along, as ye may hear the lapwing whining, for he said: "POINT AND EDGE, POINT AND EDGE! THE RED WATER AMIDST OF THE HILLS!" In my lifetime such a man hath, to my knowledge, been seen thrice before; and after each sight of him followed evil days and the death of men.'"

-The Well at the World's End, William Morris
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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:40 pm

Eldo........cheat !  Razz

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"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

Rename the LOTR Movies Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

Rename the LOTR Movies 15403410
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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:41 pm

Yeah, just think, Viggo could soothe you to a sweet, deep slumber.................after............
..............a cuddle Rename the LOTR Movies Cute-Snuggle-Wallpaper-Comp-300x187_zps0c6bf40c


Last edited by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:44 pm; edited 1 time in total

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

Rename the LOTR Movies Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

Rename the LOTR Movies 15403410
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Post by Forest Shepherd on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:43 pm

Oh ew! It took me a while to figure out what you were referencing Azriel.

Edit:
Good save with the puppy addition.


Last edited by Forest Shepherd on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:50 pm; edited 1 time in total

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"'But whereas we have drunk with thee, who seemest to be a man of lineage, and thou hast been blithe with us, we will tell thee that we have seen one riding south along the Greenway, clad in a coat as green as the way, with the leafless tree done on his breast. So nigh to him we were that we heard his cry as he sped along, as ye may hear the lapwing whining, for he said: "POINT AND EDGE, POINT AND EDGE! THE RED WATER AMIDST OF THE HILLS!" In my lifetime such a man hath, to my knowledge, been seen thrice before; and after each sight of him followed evil days and the death of men.'"

-The Well at the World's End, William Morris
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Post by Forest Shepherd on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:44 pm

erm... mis-post I guess.


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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:45 pm

yeah, Im a dab hand at cocking things up & putting my foot in it !  Very Happy

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"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

Rename the LOTR Movies Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

Rename the LOTR Movies 15403410
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Post by Tinuviel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 8:28 pm

Lord of the Rings: A tentative experiment that paid off
Lord of the Rings: Said experiment maxed up
Lord of the Rings: MORE MORE MORE!!

The Hobbit: The coloring book you threw up in
The Hobbit: Lack of utter restraint
The Hobbit: The experiment has utterly failed.

And by experiment, I'm referring to technology

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Post by malickfan on Thu Apr 24, 2014 11:25 pm

Lord of The Rings: Part 1
Lord of The Rings: Part 2
Lord of The Rings: Part 3


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Well, that was worth the wait wasn't it  Suspect


I think what comes out of a pig's rear end is more akin to what Peejers has given us-Azriel 20/9/2014
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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 11:32 pm

LOTRs1....in real blood
LOTRs2....in real animatronics
LOTRs3....in real CGI
..... Coming to a Tesco near you...

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

Rename the LOTR Movies Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

Rename the LOTR Movies 15403410
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Post by azriel on Thu Apr 24, 2014 11:37 pm

The Hobbit...an unexpected hair flick
The Hobbit....the hunt for Thorins hair piece
The Hobbit....The battle of the 5 hair salons

_________________
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. It's the job that's never started as takes longest to finish.”
"There are far, far, better things ahead than any we can leave behind"
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you always got

Rename the LOTR Movies Th_cat%20blink_zpsesmrb2cl

Rename the LOTR Movies 15403410
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Post by Mrs Figg on Thu Apr 24, 2014 11:55 pm

An Unexpected dash to the toilet
Desolation of all my fond dreams
The battle at the ticket office (as I demand a refund)


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Post by Tinuviel on Fri Apr 25, 2014 12:11 am

A Long Expected Flop
The Desecration of Canon
The Battle vs. the 5 Purists Left

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Post by chris63 on Fri Apr 25, 2014 3:32 am

Mrs Figg wrote:An Unexpected dash to the toilet
Desolation of all my fond dreams
The battle at the front desk (as I demand a refund)

Rename the LOTR Movies Laughing-happy-cat-smiley-emoticon

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Post by bungobaggins on Fri Apr 25, 2014 4:49 am

Mrs Figg wrote:An Unexpected dash to the toilet
Desolation of all my fond dreams
The battle at the front desk (as I demand a refund)

 slap laugh 

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Post by Mrs Figg on Fri Apr 25, 2014 4:00 pm

An (un)expected 48fps flop
Desolation of Sir Ians acting career
Battle of Billy Connolly pretending to take it seriously.

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Post by bungobaggins on Fri Apr 25, 2014 4:30 pm

A Long Expected Fleecing
Desolation of the Fanboy's Wallet
Battle of the Five Bank Accounts

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